A 7-yr-old’s hymn for the weekend

Well, it’s been a heck of a week and I’m done. I mean, it hasn’t been terrible, but my threshold for being done with a week is admirably low.

Even with home stuff, it’s nice to have a break from your own version of  minivan-uber, avoiding the laundry’s judgy gaze, and crushing your children’s dreams about their Jump Rope for Heart fundraising participation (If anyone else is a cold-hard-B when it comes to optional school add-ons, I AM HERE FOR YOU.) 

So exhale, it’s Friday. And no need to plan a thing – lucky for you, I already have your agenda in hand. 

See, I came across this list my 7-yr-old wrote up for weekend activities, and I think it covers the bases pretty well. 

So, since I’m tired and slightly less-than-inspired on other topics today, I’m sharing this weekend plan (with analysis) with you. 

You’re welcome. 

1. Punch. 

This kid air-punches anything that annoys her or, honestly, that she just thinks would be funny to punch. It sounds a little nutty, but I’ve found in practice is pretty therapeutic. 

Author’s note: Turns out a physical punch is not necessary. A mental punch at annoying billboards, red light camera tickets, and that judge-y laundry pile usually does the trick.

2. PARTY. 

Yesssssss. A classic on weekend lists since the dawn of time. If I didn’t have such a quirky kid who punches everything, this would probably be # 1. 

So party like you’re 4 *or 4-0* (side eye wink to a particular friend who may have one of those particular birthdays today. )

3. Go crazy/punch. 

(Reprise, with added gusto.)

4. Ride scooters. 

Ok, we’ll call this “Remember that getting outside in the sunshine IMMEDIATELY makes life better.” 

Or also just ride a scooter, whatever. 

5. Draw.

Yeah, get creative and stuff.  

6. Do starfish on mom and dad

Important: If you are an adult and do not currently climb on your mom and dad, feel free to substitute with a significant other.

“Starfishing” is what I call my children’s penchant for coming into my room on weekend mornings (when I am inevitably sleeping late) lying down on top of me, then just completely neglecting muscle function and flopping there. Like a starfish to its exhausted, slightly grouchy ocean floor.

7. EAT. 

Already there.  

8. Cartwheels. 

It’s recommended you wait 30 min after #7 before attempting #8. 

9. Play outside. 

Again – it’s a long weekend. It’s going to call for some repeats. 

10. Throw stuffed animals at mom. 

I’m slightly alarmed that she circled this one. This happens to be the only item on the list with which I vehemently disagree. 

However, edit “mom” to “dad” and I’m on board. 

11. EAT. 

Again – done and done. 

12. Go crazy for the rest of the day.

Whenever in doubt with spare time, throw caution to the wind and let loose. Your face may get snotty and your hair a tangled mess, but if my children are any indication, that is no problem at all. Apparently you won’t even notice. 

                     •••   •••   •••

Ok friends, there’s your guaranteed weekend fun. You can’t say I never did anything for you. Now get to cartwheeling before it’s time to eat again. 

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